The last time I started and then quit again was not necessarily because of a lack of time, but more because of a lack of motivation. I was studying but I didn't know what for. This time I'm keeping up very well with my study schedule. But I still don't know very well why I'm studying. Because I had to, because I missed playing to much and was ashamed of how I sounded. But that's not a goal. So I decided to look for a teacher. At least then you have lessons to look forward to.
Easier said than done. I haven't always been an easy student. I'm very demanding, always asking why, never happy with what I do. That brought me a lot of trouble with my last teacher who couldn't understand me and wasn't willing to adapt his teaching even though I changed my attitude and way of studying. So I wanted to be very careful this time. In a conversation with one of my former teachers I posed this problem and he immediately understood me. He told me I had to find someone who could guide me rather than teach me and who could help me improve my technique, because I'm very stubborn and confident when it comes to interpretation. He thought that I wouldn't be able to find a teacher who could really teach me something new about interpretation (unless I was really open to learn something new), which I took as a great compliment.
So who would be able to guide me? Of course: someone who has been trough the same process. Someone who, unlike me, had a good teacher from the very start who taught her about all the basic technique necessary to be a great clarinettist. So I hope to be able to have a lesson with her soon and in the meantime I will keep practicing so I can impress her in the first class.